Fight Night at the Kiddie Table

This is a tape delayed live-blog of the debate conducted on Tuesday for third party candidates. Exactly like the Olympics broadcast on NBC earlier this year.

I watched it so that you did not have to, and now you can read this and lie to your friends that you did. Imagine how informed you’ll appear at the water cooler when you recite the names Jill Stein, Rocky Anderson, Virgil Goode, Gary Johnson, and Aldous Huxley.

You’re welcome.

So let’s get this puppy rolling, or whatever it is that puppies do. No, I shall not be quoting people verbatim, since I am more than a mere typist. Instead, think of this as a “based on a true story” type of a thing.

BREAKING: Larry King is alive!

He is the moderator for this historic debate. Why historic? Beats me, but when an easy-on-the-eye commentator like Christina Tobin says it is historic, you accept it.

Pissfest 2012, Schieffer edition

Al Franken is the author of the #1 New York Times bestseller: Lies (And the Lying Liars Who Tell Them): A Fair and Balanced Look at the Right.  He had an interesting response to what was common in those days at FOX "News" — blaming Bill Clinton for depleting the military and blow jobs. Hannity had presented this little gem in his ghost-written book, Let Freedom Ring:

New tanks requested: 840 by St. Reagan (1986), 0 by Slick Willy (1996)
New tactical aircraft requested: 399 by St. Reagan, 34 by Slick Willy
New naval ships requested: 40 by St. Reagan, 6 by Slick Willy

Now, to address this morbidly stupid means of comparing who was more hawkish, Al Franken offered the following additional column for George the Younger (2002):

BREAKING: Larry King is Alive!

OK, here's a debate you should watch, even if it is the living corpse who'll be moderating it.

Why?

Because you know that both ex-President-to-be Obama and President-to-be Romney are just corporate cocksuckers who'll trample over due process, civil liberties and any other bullshit that gets in their way.

You'll get to watch why Gary Johnson is the sort of candidate we should consider electing instead.

Pissfest 2012, Crowley edition

OK, two down, one more to go.

A more spirited debate with very few gaffes, awkward moments or missteps. Obama looked more like himself, Romney looked just as confident and delivered another impressive performance challenging Obama's record on the economy.

He scored again on that front.

Pissfest 2012 Preview, Crowley edition

Upon us, yes it is.

Second mano-a-mano town hall debate.

Kenyan Muslin takes on The Resurgent Mormon.

Well, hate to disappoint you, but this is not going to change anything.

Predictions:

• Obama wins this one because of lowered expectations for him, heightened ones for Romney, and well, it is Obama's turn.
• Chris Matthews will be giddy, Hannity apoplectic over Crowley being in the bag for Obama, and also because conspiracy, theft...OMG WHERE WILL IT STOP!
• Nate Silver's analysis officially shows a toss-up by Friday at the latest. By next week, it'd be showing a lead in the electoral college for Romney.

Why?

For much the same reason I have been mentioning earlier: Romney SuperPACs have been going all in for a while.

Pissfest 2012, Preview of Ryan O' Biden edition

Thursday will be here sooner than we think. If it is not raining, I'll be playing three sets of tennis. The rest of you folks will be glued to the boob-tube, waiting on every single word from the mouths of The Marathon Man and the moderator Martha Raddatz.

And some of Biden's too, especially the sex-related gaffes that he will undoubtedly let fly.

Why the fuck didn't Obama inject the 47% remark?

This is something pundits were all puzzled about. And Obama supporters? Absolutely flabbergasted, disappointed, angry, but mainly exasperated!

After all, Romney was abandoning every position he once held and simply co-opting every which position of convenience. He was for regulation, green energy, for the middle class, jobs, against tax increases for the middle class, deficits and heck, against his own tax plan.

As he rained blows on a befuddled Obama, it was rather puzzling as to why the rot was not stemmed with a "Governor Romney, how can you stand there and flip your flops when you are on tape vowing never to care about the 47%?"

It seemed like the perfect rejoinder. Surely that would have arrested the progress of the runaway train that was Romney last night.

But Obama showed Herculean restraint.

Why?

Was he stunned into confusion?

Did he not remember?

Was he missing his teleprompter?

No matter what rightwingnuts think of Obama, he is not an idiot. It was not exactly a hard thing to remember.

So why?

Pissfest 2012, Lehrer edition

Finally, it was upon us. The uno of the très mano-a-mano between the RINO Mormon and the Black Muslin from Kenya finally happened. On Leehaaara's (isn't that the way to pronounce it?) watch. Which was not half as painful I thought it'd be. Other than the mundane platitudes replete with talking points from the campaign ads, ninety minutes of oxygen-sucking ensued.

Before this debate, here's what I knew:

• Debates rarely, if ever, have been game-changers, and this one was expected to be no different.
• The National Review or some rightwingnut rag "leaked" the bombshell that Romney was practicing zingers, which of course meant that he wasn't going to be zinger-happy even if he was ever planning on it. And he wasn't.
• Both sides would be downsizing expectations to the point where, each would look inept to lead the free world.

and following the debate

• Each side would claim clear victory.

Ding! I am still batting a thousand. (If I ignore that Obama's side is definitely not claiming clear victory).

Upcoming debates: Predictions

The presidential debates are coming up. I have a few ideas as to what will happen. Let's see how it works.

The overall strategy for the Romney/Ryan ticket will start by the old stand-by of focusing on the economy and raising people's overall fears about the general state of horribleness in society. They will possibly pull out some actual "facts" (whether they are true or not) about how this is all the fault of Obama directly. They will then attempt to capitalize on the fear of the audience and gain votes to cover their gap by using the standby return-to-the-Christian-era-that-never-actually-happened tactic.

D'Souza's "radio" mind/brain metaphor

I was recently watching a team debate between Michael Shermer and Sean Caroll against Dinesh D'Souza and Ian Hutchinson and at one point, D'Souza grilled Shermer about his argument that the brain creates the mind by basically using an analogy of a "radio" (actually he used an iPod which is not as good of an analogy, so I just made it better for him). D'Souza stated that the "mind" would be equivalent to the radio waves that exist outside of the radio, and the "brain" would be the radio itself. Let's call it the "mind radio" model, with "mind waves" being interpreted by the "mind radio" (i.e. brain).

Shermer wasn't actually able to refute this (granted, the format made it very difficult for him because of the quick-fire questioning). Here is the actual refutation.